


But A Thorn

by Gh057



Category: Fairy Tail
Genre: Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-04-02
Updated: 2015-04-02
Packaged: 2018-03-20 22:11:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 5
Words: 12,714
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3667110
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gh057/pseuds/Gh057
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>One tragic night leaves Lucy Heartfilia with a broken soul, damaged by a horrific assault that left much more than her body injured. As she attempts to recover from her attack, her dearest friend, Natsu Dragneel, learns of her battery and becomes her guardian and her stability. Together they work to heal old wounds and evolve into something more. TRIGGER WARNING.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Beginning

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: This story is rated M for a reason. Please heed my trigger warning.  
> Trigger Warning  
> The following story contains graphic depictions of sexual assault and trauma. Harsh language and mature themes imminent. Please do not read if faint of heart.
> 
> Disclaimer: I do not own Fairy Tail.

.+*+.

 

               After waiting alone for two hours, I was fed up. My elbow was sore from propping my head up on the table. The entire contents of the bread basket now rested inside my stomach and my wine glass had been emptied twice. I was stood up, again. Typical. With a sigh I downed the remainder of my cup and flagged the waiter over. The look he gave me made my insides cringe, pure pity filled his icy blue eyes.

               “Ms. Heartfilia?” he crooned, a weak smile touching his lips.

               “I’m ready for the check, Francis,” I muttered, dejected.

               “I’m so sorry, love,” he murmured, gently touching my shoulder as he placed the bill for my alcohol in front of me.

               I wished I could say that I was used to this treatment; that I wasn’t bothered. But I was. Ever since I had been featured in Sorcerer Magazine my invitations to go out had skyrocketed. However, it all seemed to be a cruel joke as the past three I’d accepted had decided to ditch me. Just what kind of torment would I receive from Aquarius when I told her? I dreaded the thought.

               Instinctively, I reached for my hip, expecting to brush my fingertips over my celestial keys. Of course I’d left them at home, knowing I wouldn’t need my keys or my whip just going out on a date. Instead I’d opted to wear a gorgeous, crimson dress. It clung to my body in all the right places and a large slit up the thigh revealed just enough skin to be considered sexy. I’d done my makeup to match: bold, but natural. I scoffed as I smoothed the dress down as I rose and began to leave the restaurant. What a waste. I should have taken Levy’s offer and had a girls’ night.

               It was chillier outside than I’d expected it to be. My arms clutched my frame, trembling slightly as my heels clicked across the asphalt. My breath came out in wispy, white puffs. What a mistake.

               As I walked, I cursed myself. This was the _last_ time I’d be going out. I wouldn’t take another date attempt. Men sucked. Well, most of them. My thoughts turned to my best friend. His spikey pink hair and goofy grin always put me in a good mood. Perhaps he and Happy would come over and spend the rest of the night playing card games with me. Tonight wouldn’t have been such a waste after all.

               I smiled, determined to make it home and give them a call (if they weren’t already at my place, which knowing those two, they’d snuck in and raided my fridge anyway).

Lost by my own thoughts, I hadn’t noticed the sound of footfalls matching mine until I came to cross the street. When I’d stopped, it had taken a few moments for the sounds of steps to die out behind me. My heart rate accelerated. The hair of the back of my neck rose, and not from the biting cold in the air.

I turned, facing my pursuer. The man was slightly older than I was. He looked nice enough. His hair was an emerald green that made me think of Freid. Looking at his eyes I noticed they were a deep, chocolate brown. He had a gentle chin and a small demeanor. He must be on his way home as well.

I offered him a smile and nodded my head, blonde locks whipping against my cheeks as the wind picked up. “Evening,” I said kindly.

He studied me for a moment. Too long of a moment. Chills filled my core and I clutched myself tighter, shielding my body. “Good evening, Lucy,” he finally said.

“Hm? Have we met?” I questioned, wondering why the feeling of dread was beginning to course through me.

“No. We haven’t. I saw your spread in Sorcerer Magazine. You’re a Fairy Tail wizard and easy enough to recognize. Hey, where are your keys? I’d love to meet a zodiac spirit. Leo has always fascinated me.”

I shouldn’t answer. I knew I should break into a run. But my body was frozen and my mouth decided to speak before my brain. “I left them at home. I was supposed to have a date tonight.”

“Ah, what a shame.” The man stepped closer to me. I stepped backwards. My heel gave out from under me, causing my ankle to twist at a sickening level. I cried out as I began to fall. The stranger reached out and caught me roughly by my right arm. He jerked me up, causing me to let out a sharp exhale of pain.

As his fingers dug into my flesh, I saw that his nails were disgustingly dirty. Mud caked the underside of them and they were much too uneven.

“What a pretty little tattoo,” he hissed, twisting my hand to examine my Fairy Tail mark. “It’s not going to do anything to help you, Lucy.”

I choked out a sob, my left hand balled into a fist and I swung with all my strength at his head. He caught my attack with his other hand. “Oh no, dear Lucy. There’s no stopping this. I’ve watched you for some time.” His face was inches from mine, his breath smelled rotten. I felt the color leave my face.

“P-please,” I stammered, “let me go.”

“Not until we’re done,” he snarled.

I lurched my knee upward, thankful for such a large slit in my dress and successfully collided with his groin. It was enough for him to release me and he cursed in agony. Turning, I bolted, aiming for any sort of sanctuary I could find. I made it a few yards before he caught me, ripping me off my feet by my long, blonde hair. Sparks of pain shot from my cranium down to my toes as he dragged me off the street, into an alley. I screamed. I begged. I offered him anything he wanted. Salty tears licked down my face, the black mascara turning into a raccoon’s mask as I pleaded for him to just let me go. I was a member of the strongest team in the strongest guild in all of Fiore. And none of it mattered.

With a violence I thought only could be possessed by dark wizards he threw me, hard, onto the ground. I cried out as my elbows scuffed the hard concrete, leaving flakes of my skin behind. My anguish only seemed to excite this monster.

With one knee he pinned me by my abdomen, pushing all his weight against my internal organs. I closed my eyes, tears streaking down my face even faster, snot oozing out of my nose as his dirty hand ripped my gown. He dipped those disgusting fingers into the most precious and sacred part of my flesh. I bit my lip as hard as I could to try and mask the pain. “What a naughty little mage you are,” he breathed into my ear. I tried to bash my skull against him but he pulled away. “There’s no fighting this, Lucy,” he snarled. And I knew he was right. He was stronger than me, outweighing me by three stone, at least. Without my spirits, my whip, or my friends, I was nothing. I was just some heiress who felt entitled to something different.

_Mavis, please let me die. Right here, please. I don’t want this._ I implored the idea of death. Anything was better than what was happening to me. Nothing came to help me. No one heard my screams and cries.

Except for this monster. All my pleading did was make his blood race. I looked onto his face for only a moment and saw the sickest, cruelest joy in his horrifyingly dark eyes before he took me in the most intimate way one can take a person. He slammed into my core, and I screamed. I felt my inner walls tear at the punishment, pain caused my vision to white out.

And as soon as it had begun, it was over. The monster was gone. I was alone, bruised and bleeding in the alley. My dress was destroyed, but not nearly as much as I was. I laid on the ground, sobbing and begging to go back before all this until I lost track of time.

Maybe minutes, maybe hours passed before I struggled to my feet. I had to get home. I had to get clean. I stumbled along the familiar path to my apartment. I stopped three times and retched over into the canal, losing all the bread and wine I had consumed earlier in the night.

Once inside, I ran to the toilet and vomited again. I looked in the mirror above my bathroom sink and saw my face. My big, brown eyes were caked in smeared makeup; I was all red and puffy. My hair was disheveled. I felt (and looked) like a ghost. Trembling, I slid out of my ruined dress and in a fit of rage threw both it and my shoes out the window, into the canal below.

I sank against the wall, naked and sticky, and held my legs against my chest. I stayed like that, in hysterics for several moments before drawing water for a bath. I had to get clean. I had to wash this sin off of me. I turned the stream as hot as it would get. And it was like liquid fire, but it wasn’t hot enough. Even as I felt my skin burn, I still felt my attacker’s touch.

The water between my legs turned pink and I cried out in horror, washing the blood off my thighs. I rubbed myself with soap until I was raw, emptied the bath, and proceeded to repeat this process. What was I going to do? I couldn’t tell anyone about this. The guild would realize how weak I was. All my friends would abandon me for someone stronger, someone who could defend themselves. This was a demon I had to fight on my own. I never, ever could let anyone know. Except… An idea struck me and I reached for my celestial keys.

I held contracts with my spirits. _Technically_ , I thought, _they can help me and never tell a soul. Not if I tell them not to._ Before I had really thought this plan through, Aquarius’ key was between my fingers. “Open, gate of the water bearer,” I choked out, having problems finding my voice. And then, there she was. Annoyed and angry at me, whipping her blue hair out of her face.

“You interrupted my date with Scorpio! You’re going to pay for this, how _dare y—“_ her cold eyes turned to me, weeping in the tub water with her, clutching my naked body. “L-Lucy?!” the zodiac gasped, her anger completely vanished. All that was left was concern from my older, dearest spirit. “Lucy, what happened?!” she shouted at me, panic filling her face.

I caved, I told her everything. She held me against her as I bawled my eyes out, clinging to her form, terrified she would leave me alone in this bathroom. “I’m so weak. You always tell me how pathetic I am, and you’re right.”

“Lucy, goodness, Lucy… No! Never.” The water bearer hugged me tightly against her, shielding me. “Oh Lucy, we can fix this. Go call Natsu an—“

“No!” I screamed at the top of my lung, shoving her away. Panic and adrenalin surged through me as I viciously shook my head at her suggestion. “No, they are never to know. No one is ever to know!”

“Lu—“ Aquarius began to argue with me. I wouldn’t have it. Exasperated, she relented. “Alright well at least summon Leo… We need to get you into bed and calmed down.”

“No! I won’t summon Loke. I won’t summon Scorpio, or Taurus, or Cancer!” the thought of being around a male made my stomach flip and knot.

“Okay, well I need help, Lucy! I don’t know how to handle this sort of thing!” The water spirit actually sounded nervous, almost panicked at me. It was enough to make me draw a breath.

“H-how about Aries and Virgo?” I whispered.

“Okay.”

The three Zodiac spirits comforted me, and Aries even brought my Plue with her through the gate so I could hold onto his little shaking form for security. Eventually they coaxed me into bed. Before I knew it, I was out like a light.

I awoke the next morning, aching and sore from my scalp down to the tips of my toes. I immediately began crying again, recalling the night previous’ events. A hand rested on my shoulder and squeezed lightly. I jumped, startled at the connection and turned to face the perpetrator. Loke looked at me with hard eyes, pushing the brim of his glasses back up his nose. “L-Loke?” I stammered, trembling under his touch.

“Lucy, I’d never hurt you,” he whispered gently. “You knew those three would tell me what happened. I opened my gate and watched over you all night. I knew you wouldn’t want to be alone.”

Affection suddenly filled me and I launched my throbbing body into his welcoming arms. I buried my face into his neck and sobbed, clinging to his jacket as if I was afraid he’d disappear. “I’m not going anywhere,” he responded, running a hand over my messy blonde hair.

“L-Loke, what am I going to d-do?” I wailed.

“I don’t know,” the lion answered honestly. We sat in my bed for a few minutes, my faithful spirit holding me as I cried into him. “You’re so strong, Lucy.”

His words gave me resolve. “I won’t let this destroy me!” I suddenly declared, the tears drying up. “I’ll just get stronger! And, I’ll carry my keys everywhere with me,” I added sheepishly and was glad to see that made a ghost of a smile appear on Leo’s lips.

“Get dressed. Would you like me to escort you to the guild hall?”

“Mm!” I nodded, clutching my right fist over my heart.

I was shocked to see the girl looking back at me in the mirror was the same Lucy that I’d woken up to every morning. There were bags under my eyes and my face was slightly puffy from all the tears I’d shed. But those were still my chocolate eyes. That was still my shiny hair. I was feeling full of confidence until I looked down at my arms and saw the bright, purple bruises snaking over them. I gasped and looked away, feeling my heart race. Loke was beside me instantly, supporting me by my back. In his hand was my arm warmers, I hadn’t worn them in so long. I felt queasy.

“It’s cold enough outside, no one will think anything of you wearing these today, and a pair of jeans.” I nodded and shakily pulled the warmed up to my biceps. Loke assisted in tying the yellow ribbons for me.

We left my apartment when I had finished getting ready. I left my hair down in a halo around my face, hoping it would hide the pain on my features. Walking was difficult. Between my legs ached terribly and it caused me to hobble slightly.

The guild hall was bustling with noise and excitement. Everyone was living their lives as if mine hadn’t come to a fiery crash the night before. Mira smiled at me from behind the bar as I walked in, waving. “Good morning, Lucy!” she called.

“Oi’! Luc’! There you are!” I locked eyes with my best friend. Natsu Dragneel, the fire dragon slayer. Salamander. He was standing in the middle of the room, with our friend, Gray’s neck trapped beneath his grasp. They were clearly bickering as usual. The ice mage was punching against Natsu’s chest and going ignored. “Later, ice princess!” the pink-haired male quipped, releasing Gray and running over to me. “Where you been all morning, Luc’?” he asked and then eyed Loke suspiciously. “Loke. What are you doing here?”

Terrified, I looked at the celestial spirit, silently pleading for him to remain quiet. He respected my wishes. “It was a lovely morning, I wanted to spend some time with my dear Princess.”

Natsu scoffed and pulled me away from him. “Go flirt with someone else, lion,” he grumbled, pulling me out of Loke’s grasp. Luckily, Natsu didn’t notice my flinch as he closed his fist around my arm. “Want to do a mission today? Just me, you, and Happy!” He grinned so wide at me, I felt my heart crack a little. The thought of going out into the world today was out of the question.

I shook my head. “No Natsu,” I whispered weakly. “I’m not feeling up to doing a mission today.”

“What’s wrong? You sick or something?” Concern filled his obsidian eyes as he looked over my body. I felt so exposed at that penetrating stare.

“No!” I screamed, leaping away from him. I wrapped my arms around my chest and began to shake violently. I felt the eyes of several guild mates wander in our direction.

Natsu looked like a puppy I’d just kicked. “W-wha’?... O-okay, Lucy.” His eyes hooded and I felt like a complete shrew. My heart pounded in my throat. I felt the tears begin to form in the corners of my eyes. I wasn’t ready for this. I couldn’t be here.

With a choked sob, I turned on my heel and sprinted as fast as I could out of the guild hall. Loke was on my heels, calling for me to stop. I didn’t slow until I was back at my apartment. I threw myself onto my plush bed and wept into my pillow. I heard Loke pull my desk chair out and place it beside the bed. I heard his weight as he plopped down into the chair. He didn’t speak to me. I didn’t speak to him. But he was there, my silent guardian, watching over my broken soul.

 

.+*+.


	2. Annoyed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own Fairy Tail.  
> Trigger Warning: Please refer to Chapter 1, Beginnings, for my trigger warning and take heed.  
> A/N: Thank you so much to everyone who took the time to read my story! And to those who reviewed, thank you! All your follows and kind words definitely will keep me going. So I’ve decided to write this story in alternating styles. 1st person Lucy/3rd person Natsu. Every odd chapter will belong to 1st person Lucy. Every even chapter will be for 3rd person Natsu. What do you guys think? I’d love the feedback!  
> Anyway! Enjoy the next installment of But a Thorn.  
> Gh057

.+*+.

 

               Natsu Dragneel stared after his best friend with a slack jaw. It took him a few moments to blink his eyes and just as he was about to launch after the Celestial Mage a mailed gauntlet grabbed him by the shoulder. “No,” Erza Scarlet commanded the dragon slayer.

               “Erza,” Natsu began to protest but he was silenced by a glare for the requip mage.

               “Something is clearly very wrong with Lucy, let’s give her a few moments before we go and overwhelm her,” the red-head stated simply.

               Natsu felt the anger rise in him. “She’s my best friend,” he snarled, teeth clenched. He balled his fists.

“All the more reason to back off. Give her the morning, part of the afternoon. You and Happy go check on her tonight.”

His black eyes flashed at his friend. “Erza,” he hissed. “Something is wrong, I can’t just…”

“Natsu. You _will_ do as she heeds,” Makarov the guild master spoke up from where he’d been silently observing, perched on the bar with his legs crossed and his fingers steepled. “There are times when you chase after someone and times when you must let them breathe.”

Shamefully, Natsu bowed his head. His fists shook in anger. “Come on, Happy,” he said darkly. “Let’s go fishing.” He turned on his heel and stormed out of the guild hall, not caring if the exceed followed him or not.

“A-aye sir?” Happy blinked after him, glancing at Carla and Pantherlily before spreading his wings to follow the dragon slayer out of the hall. “Natsu?” the blue-haired cat asked, catching easily up to him. “Are you okay?”

“No. I’m not okay because Lucy is not okay.”

The Exceed frowned but chose not to say anything. His friend was not in any sort of speaking mood. The wind whipped wildly at their faces; Natsu’s rosy hair danced with the breeze, messy as always. It wasn’t long before the duo reached the river. Unhappily, the dragon slayer flopped onto the bank. His eyes glowered into the water, slight tendrils of smoke wafted from his nostrils.

Happy watched him, worry etched into his feline features. Uneasily, the cat sat beside Natsu and cast his line into the river. For several minutes they sat in silence. The forest whispered quietly to them. Mist blew into their eyes with every rustle of wind. Zero fish attempted to bite as time wore on.

“Hey, Natsu?” Happy questioned cautiously.

“Yeah, Happy?” he replied, feeling the nerves inside his friend’s voice.

The cat pulled his line back in and turned so that he was facing the mage. “What do you think is wrong with Lucy? Maybe she just ate too much fish.”

A faint smile ghosted his pale, pink lips. “I hope that’s all it is.” He leaned backwards, into the sand. His muscular arms supported his head as he gazed up through the branches and towards the sky. “I… I don’t think that’s the problem though, Happy,” he sighed, dejected. “She had a date last night, remember? I bet she got stood up again.”

“Poor Lucy.”

“Yeah. If she gets hurt one more time by stupid dates, we’ll burn them to a crisp. Right, Happy?”

“Aye, sir!” The exceed beamed, “It’s been a few hours. Let’s go check on Lucy!”

“Good idea.” Natsu leapt to his feet and dusted his clothes off. The pair strolled from the woods, trekking towards the canal and in the direction of Lucy’s apartment.

Outside of Lucy’s bedroom window, Natsu lifted his nose and breathed in deeply. The smell of salt was in the air. Inwardly, the dragon slayer cringed. It was clear that his best friend had been crying. That made him frown. He tried her door knob. Locked, of course. That never stopped him before.

With Happy’s help he reached her bedroom window and braced his fingers against the seal and pulled. The glass didn’t budge. “Huh? She always leaves her window unlocked,” he murmured. As the sound escaped his lips a muffled bang hit the window.

A plush pillow soared through the air and flopped pathetically against the glass. The dragon slayer could hear the shrill rage from inside the room. “Natsu! You idiot!” The words were choked with tears. “Why can’t you use a door, like a _SANE_ person?!”

He pushed his face against the glass, looking at Lucy Heartfilia. The blonde was sitting up in bed, clutching another pillow against her chest. Her face was puffy and red, stained with tears. Her hair was in tangles, as if she been pulling at it as she sobbed. Beside the bed he saw Loke, sitting with his arms crossed over his chest. The spirit was calm, silent: observing.

“I tried the door, it was locked,” Natsu said, raising his voice so that the celestial mage would hear him. “I always use the window when the door is locked because you leave it open for me.” His dark eyes softened with concern. “Why was your window locked, Luc’?”

               The second pillow smacked against the glass. “Because it _should always_ be locked! It’s safer that way!” Lucy fell back into a heap on her bed, trembling. “Go away, Natsu,” she whispered.

               Without his keen senses, he wouldn’t have heard it. But he did hear it. His brows stitched together. “Lucy…” he called, aching. “What did I do?”

               Only silence answered him. Natsu turned his head towards Loke, pleading for answers. The lion shook his head to the side, adjusted his glasses, and looked back to the blonde. Ignored by Lucy. Annoyed by Loke. Natsu jumped away from the window, fuming once again. “What the _fuck?”_ he screamed as he landed on the sidewalk, his hands clenched into fists. “The hell did I do?”

               “N-Natsu?” Happy questioned, fluttering nearby.

               “Screw this, Happy. I’m going for a walk.”

               The exceed knew that meant he wasn’t invited. He watched pink hair vanish around a corner and turned his big eyes up to Lucy’s window. “Lucy…” the cat whined, “I hope you’re okay.” With that, he fly back to the guild hall.

               The dragon slayer stormed down road after road, kicking loose pebbles and muttering curses under his breath. “Why would she be doing this to me? I didn’t do anything,” he said to no one in particular. “I get she’s upset but I want to _help_ her.”

               He sauntered in annoyance, smoke visibly rising off of his shoulders. Citizens of Magnolia stepped out of his way, some even going as far as to completely change sides of the street. The wind had died down as the evening approached, the canal’s waters were tame off to his side.

               He walked. His pace never faltering.

               In the distance was the sound of children playing. An old couple bickering about what to do for dinner. A shop keeper and a patron bartering back and forth. One man drunkenly insulting another. It was all so normal. The world was in the right order. And yet…

               Natsu Dragneel’s world was in anything but order. The emotions he had read off of his best friend left his heart twisted in a way far more different than he had ever experienced before. He was _so_ angry at her and yet he couldn’t be angry at her, not really. She was experiencing a pain that he had no idea how to identify. It scared him.

               “I just want my Lucy back,” he said, leaning forward against the canal. The water below moved in a lazy line. The dragon slayer watched it churn slowly down the hill. With a sigh, he placed his chin on the hard slab, chewing on his lip with a pointy tooth.

               Some caught his eye at that angle. A flag or something stuck in one of the drain waves. It was a pretty crimson. The fabric danced where it was stuck. The liquid hit it at just the right angle, and the material was suddenly free. Natsu saw that it wasn’t a flag at all, it was a dress.

               He breathed in deeply, sniffing the sweet water of the canal. His nostrils were hit hard with an entirely different smell. He doubted he would have recognized it if he hadn’t spent nearly every single day around that aroma for the past several years. The water had nearly washed it away. The faintest hint of strawberries and vanilla. A clean smell, mixed with what he could only describe as star dust. It was the same fragrance that Lucy’s celestial spirits and _fleuve d’etoiles_ always had.

               Lucy.

               Without thinking the dragon slayer launched himself into the canal. Several people retiring into their homes stopped to watch the insane fairy tail wizard as he splashed around, his long, tanned fingers stretching out to grab onto the red satin. Awkwardly, Natsu clambered back out of the water, thoroughly soaked but triumphantly clutching the soiled dress.

               He shook his pink hair, sending spray in every direction. His jacket came off and he proceeded to wring the excess water back into the canal, trying in vain to dry his clothes. “How’d you get here?” he asked the dress, dripping at his feet. A smile began to creep across his lips until he really got to examine the gown. He stretched it out flat against the concrete and felt his innards clench and constrict.

               It was destroyed and not from the water. It was torn in several deliberate places. One across the chest. A sleeve was completely severed; it would hang useless and limp off Lucy’s shoulder. Where there’d once been a delicate slit, now the fabric was shredded much farther, clear to where Lucy’s naval would have been.

               Natsu stumbled backwards, clutching at the scarf Igneel had given him. He exhaled shakily. Then, he inhaled deeply and instantly bile rose in his throat. There was more than just Lucy on this dress. So much more. He didn’t know how to identify it. Clinging to this once gorgeous dress was the distinct musk of a man. And blood. Lucy’s blood. Blood that he’d sacrifice anything for it to never spill. Fearful sweat, the kind from facing death head on held onto the fabric.

               He lost composure at the last odor. The sticky, sometimes intoxicating perfume of sex. This was not a smell of joy, like what hovered around the newly wed Gajeel and Levy Redfox. Nor was it the passion that clung so heavily to Glidarts. Nothing close to the loving aroma that he noticed from Gray and Juvia when they sat just a bit too close at the guild hall. This was pure horror.

               He clenched his fists as tears sparked into the corners of his eyes. His jaw clenched. Rage boiled his blood.

               He left the dress on the street, turned tail, and sprinted at a speed he rarely ever used back toward Lucy’s apartment.

               The dragon slayer stopped below her window to catch his breath, visibly shaking from the adrenaline coursing through his body.

               With deep, quivering breaths he began to calm himself. He closed his eyes and rested his forward on the bricks, listening for any sort of noise from his best friend’s window.

               “Lucy, you need to eat.” Loke’s voice.

               “I-I can’t.” Lucy’s response.

               “Please.” The celestial spirit pleading with his master.

               “No.” His best friend’s choked reply.

               Slowly, Natsu sank forward onto his knees, grinding his teeth. The dragon slayer felt guilty for eavesdropping but not guilty enough to stop and turn away.

               “Lucy,” Leo sounded determined, like the alpha male he was. “I will not let you starve.”

               “L-Loke, I can’t do this,” Lucy’s reply was barely a whisper. “I can’t do anything anymore.”

               “You will heal.”

               “I won’t.”

               The words ripped at Natsu’s heart, and yet he listened on.

               “How can someone heal from this? What am I going to do Loke? I still feel him. I smell him. I hear him. Every second that passed I’m reliving my _rape_ over and over. And I am helpless. I’m as helpless now as I was then.”

               The odor of tears hit Natsu hard and it took a moment to realize that it was coming from his eyes. Ashamed, he used the back of his damp sleeve to wipe his eyes dry. Rape. Mavis, his suspicion—no—his worst fear was true. “Luc’…”

               Again, Natsu was furious. He was furious at Lucy, for trying to handle this on her own without her guild. He was furious at Loke, for helping her hide it. He was beyond furious at the monster that had molested his best friend. But most of all, Natsu Dragneel was livid at himself because he let it happen.

               He knew, beyond a doubt, that he could have prevented it. He could have stopped it.

               “Luc’, I’m _so_ sorry,” he whispered to the brick wall.

               Resolve hit the stubborn dragon like a brick. He stood and vanished down the street.

               An hour later, he was back under her window. His clothes were clean and dry. He had a knapsack slung over one shoulder. With a smirk he strolled casually up to her front door and knocked with far more force than was necessary.

               An exasperated Loke swung the door open. He glowered at Natsu from under the brim of his glasses. “What do you want, Natsu?”

               “I’ve come to hang out with Luc’,” he challenged right back at the spirit.

               “She’s not feeling well.”

               “I brought her some dinner.”

               “She’s not hungry.”

               “I. Am. Not. Leaving,” Natsu annunciated every syllable and glared unwavering into the feral eyes looking back at him. A fire cracked from his knuckles. It was a brash warning but Loke accepted it.

               “I don’t know what you think you know,” the spirit warned, “but if you make _one_ stupid move, I’ll have your head.”

               “I’ll take it for you,” the dragon slayer replied with a smile.

               He pushed past the lion and into the apartment. “Luccyyy~!” he cooed. “I’m home!”

 

.+*+.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: There we have it! Thank you for reading But A Thorn’s second chapter. I hope you look forward to more to come! ^-^
> 
> Oh, and I’d love if you reviewed or left a comment!


	3. Agreeing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own Fairy Tail. Please heed my Trigger Warning in Chapter 1, Beginnings.  
> A/N: I had today off so I spent a big chunk of today neglecting errands to write the third chapter instead. I’m so happy so many people are enjoying this story! Thank you guys, every single one!

.+*+.

 

That voice. My breath hitched in my throat causing an annoying hiccup sound to escape my lips. Instinctively, I pulled my bedspread up to my chin.

Natsu Dragneel barged into my room, clutching an overly full backpack in his arms. His goofy grin plastered on his face, eyes squinted in my direction. Loke followed behind him with a scowl, looking over Natsu’s shoulder and into my eyes questioningly.

I opened my mouth to kick the dragon slayer out, to yell at him and force him to leave. But something made me change my mind. I visibly relaxed, my shoulders falling in defeat as Natsu propped himself on the edge of my bed, tossing the contents of his pack onto the sheets. This was my best friend. He wouldn’t ever hurt me. I allowed a smile to ghost across my lips. “I’ll summon you if I need you, Loke,” I said.

Leo looked like he was about to protest until he looked into my visibly calmed eyes. He shoved his glasses up his nose with one finger and nodded briefly. “Don’t hesitate.” With that, the spirit left, vanishing back into the celestial world.

Natsu was busy organizing takeout containers in a shrine over my bed. “Natsu!” I chirped, slightly startled. “What are you doing?!”

“Huh? I’m just setting up our food.” He retrieved two pairs metal chop sticks from his bag and extended one to me, grinning from ear to ear.

I slunk down, guiltily. “I-I’m not hungry, Natsu.”

The dragon slayer shrugged, gingerly placing my utensils over my legs. “Whatever, Luc’! More for me!” He reached out and grabbed the nearest box. As he lifted the lid away a delicious aroma hit my nose. My stomach growled in protest. Apparently my body was hungry, even if I was not. The pink haired male inhaled the steam then visibly licked his lips before attacking the contents.

“It’sh good, Lush,” he garbled through a mouth of food, spraying particles across my sheets.

_Ugh, gross!_ “Natsu!” I whined, reaching over to push him. A grin spread across my lips and I made contact with his arm, tipping him sideways off my bed. He hit the floor with a loud clunk; somehow his food container remained upright.

I couldn’t help it. My body hurt all over. I was exhausted from crying the day away. My soul ached. I was terrified of everything. Nervous that I’d never be okay ever again. But I couldn’t help the erratic laugh that escaped from my throat at the look on Natsu’s face, staring up at me from his position on the ground. I couldn’t control it. I guffawed; tears pricking once more at the corners of my eyes. These tears, however, came from my merriment. I laughed until my sides hurt, my muscles stitching all across my abdomen. I clutched at my stomach, at the bruises from my assault and continued my hysterics.

Natsu watched me, bewildered. My mood was contagious because after a few moments, he began to chuckle too. He drooped his head in shame as his entire body shook with amusement.

I’m not sure how long we stayed like that. All I know is that when we finally had regained our breath his eyes were burning into me and his smile was a thin, concerned line.

“Lucy,” he murmured, setting his takeout to the side. I flinched, grasping once more at my covers. “Lucy, I’m not sure what’s going on,” as he said that he shifted his eyes to the side. I couldn’t help if wonder that he was maybe stretching the truth. He rose onto his knees, leaning against my bedframe. Slowly, he lifted his hand over to mine. He brushed his rough, callused fingers over my pink tattoo. As he grazed over my knuckles, an involuntary shudder ran through my body. “I’m here for you. I’ll never leave your side. You’re my best friend.”

His smile brightened my soul and I turned my palm over to squeeze his hand. “Thank you, Natsu,” I whispered meekly. A faint blush caressed my cheeks.

“You’re hungry, let’s eat.” He jumped back onto my bed, crossing his legs and facing me.

Reluctantly, I nodded. “Alright.”

The dragon slayer smirked triumphantly and handed me a cardboard container. We ate in silence for a few moments, both of us looking down at our food. “Natsu?” I finally questioned.

“Mm?”

“Why is your backpack so full?” He eyed me curiously for a moment and then jammed a hunk of food into his mouth, ignoring the question. I felt my blood shoot with annoyance. “Natsu?” I growled.

He took his time chewing, all the while I stared him down. “Well,” he finally began, “You see… Happy’s been spending a ton of time with Carla and Wendy lately. My house is feeling kinda empty. Lonely, ya know?”

I watched him with narrowed eyes.

“So. I figured I’d stay here for a while!”

“Natsu!” I protested. “You can’t just invite yourself to live with me! This is not the way that the world works. No, absolut—“

“I’ll pay the entirety of the rent, of course,” he added simply, cutting me off midsentence.

Oh. Rent. I hadn’t thought of rent after everything… I couldn’t take any jobs. I was too weak. I didn’t think I could even leave my apartment again. I clenched my teeth together. “Okay… But Natsu, we need to lay down some ground rules.” I took a deep breath, clearing the empty containers off my bed to be thrown away after our conversation.

“Yeah?” he asked, genuinely listening to me.

My eyebrow twitched. “Privacy is important to me. If I want to be alone, you need to let me be alone. No barging into locked doors. Do not leave a mess. Dirty laundry goes in the hamper, not on the bathroom floor. If you spill something, clean it up. No setting fire—to anything.”

He nodded as I spoke, smiling slightly. “Okay,” he answered when I was done.

“Okay?” I questioned, taken aback.

“Okay. Deal.”

I blinked and cocked an eyebrow up, it disappeared into my blonde bangs. “Why was that so easy?” I dreaded the answer.

“They seem like good rules, Luc’. Of course I’ll agree to them. But—“ _Great, I knew there was a catch._ “I have some conditions too.” I let out a sigh, determined to listen to him just as he had respected and listened to me. “I know something is wrong. Talk to me about it when you’re ready. If you’re ever ready. We’ll just go ahead and say that I realize something is eating at you, so please don’t try to hide that you’re hurting. If you need to cry, cry. I’ll be a shoulder for you to lean on. I’m here to listen when you’re ready or just give comfort.”

He let out a breath, talking rather quickly. His words caused my cheeks to burn and I guiltily started to nibble on my lip. Natsu continued, “You have to stay healthy. I won’t let you waste away.” He lifted a finger as I began to open my mouth, silencing me. “Let me finish,” he warned and I knew better than to challenge him. “You will not sit in this bed for the rest of your life, Lucy Heartfilia. When I feel you’re ready, we will accept a mission. It can be just us two, or we can bring along the rest of the gang. That can be your decision. You’re not going to blot Fairy Tail out of your life. You know just as well as I do that no one will let that happen. Mira would go Satan soul on your ass,” he smirked wickedly at me and I couldn’t help but smile.

“Mm, okay,” I whispered weakly, moisture threatening my eyes once more. “It sounds like a deal to me.”

I didn’t want to admit it but I was overjoyed that Natsu would remain by my side. I didn’t want to be alone and I knew that Loke couldn’t stay out of the Celestial Spirit world forever. Outside my window, the stars winked down at us. Muffled voices crept through the glass as citizens of Magnolia began to retire for the evening. I considered telling Natsu about everything that had transpired but decided against it when I felt a rush of pain shoot from between my legs and course over the rest of my body.

Suddenly panicked and tore out of the bed. “I-I need to take a shower!” I cried, sprinting into the bathroom. The door slammed behind me and I pressed my back against the wood, shaking like a leaf. I felt the man touching me, his tongue sliding over my neck. Tears freely streaked down my cheeks.

The water scolded my flesh as I let it cascade over me. I rubbed at my skin viciously with a loofa, burning away the taint of that monster’s touch. I stayed under the spray until I began to lose hot water. The chill started to reach my spine and just as I was about to switch the spout off, it suddenly turned blistering again. Natsu.

That man had warmed up the water heater. I rolled my eyes. There he was, already breaking the rules and setting my apartment on fire. Well, I couldn’t complain about this. I smiled as I leaned against the tile in the shower, fidgeting with my finger nails.

After I had turned into a giant, pale prune I decided it was time to get out. I wiped the steam away from my mirror and looked at the woman staring back at me. I wrapped my blonde hair into a towel and stepped back, taking in the entirety of myself. The bruises on my arms were starting to get a sickly yellow aura over this. My thighs were still a deep, ugly purple where he’d dug his fingers into my skin. My elbows were skinned. These injuries would heal. As my right hand lifted between my breasts, feeling the trumpeting of my heart, I sighed. I wasn’t sure if it would ever heal.

I’d been far too emotional today. I was drained, weak. I couldn’t force anymore tears. I couldn’t even let the rage built inside my chest. I heaved myself into warm pajamas and left my hair to air dry.

Outside the bathroom, Natsu was cleaning up. My jaw nearly hit the floor. Not only had the dragon slayer thrown out the trash and wiped clean any mess, he’d changed the sheets on my bed and dusted my vanity. “Oi’, there ya are. Was scared you’d dissolved in there,” he said with a grin.

I stared at him, speechless. My feet moved before I made the connection to what I was doing. I threw myself into his arms, burying my face into his chest. He smelled of campfires and cinnamon and I breathed in the perfume of my best friend as more tears found their way to escape my eyes. “L-Lucy?!” he gaped, gently running his hand over my soggy hair. “What’s wrong?!”

“T-thank you,” I sobbed.

I felt the rumble in his chest before I heard his chuckle escape his throat. “Lucy, there’s nothing to thank me for,” he crooned honestly.

“No. There is so much to thank you for,” I argued, stepping back from him and wiping my eyes with my sleeves.

He chose not to dispute with me, instead he just shrugged. “It’s late. Let’s get some sleep, okay?”

I nodded in agreement and climbed into my bed. He hovered outside of my door for a few moments, watching me in the dark. “I’ll be right over on the couch if you need me,” he finally said before quietly padding away.

I was out like a light the moment my head hit the pillow, physically drained.

The smell of meat sizzling startled me awake. I groaned loudly and propped myself up onto my elbows. My head was slamming and my eyes were terribly sore but my stomach rumbled in annoyance. Light cascaded onto my sheets and I briefly wondered what time it was. One look at the digital clock on the nightstand told me it was 10:39 in the morning and that I’d been sleeping for a very long time.

Outside my room I heard faint whispers of conversation. I strained to pick out the voices that were coming from my kitchen. Laughter assaulted my ears.

“Oi’! Shuddup, Lucy is sleeping.” That was Natsu.

“Oops, sorry.” Happy, of course. I grinned, that silly little blue cat.

“It’s about time that she got up, don’t you think?” Another voice? Who was that? I frowned.

“She’s not feeling well,” Natsu defended me.

“Well sitting in bed isn’t going to fix it,” the other voice grumbled again and I recognized it. Erza Scarlet.

“I’m almost done with breakfast, so I’m sure she’ll be up momentarily.” That chipper voice belonged to Levy McGard—no—Redfox, my closest female friend.

That was a lot of company. My stomach churned. I knew Erza wouldn’t let me stay in bed and I definitely wasn’t going to discuss my rape with anyone. I had to face the music and count on Natsu to be my backbone and monitor my emotions and save me if I needed him to.

Reluctantly, I swung my legs out of the sheets and pulled my robe on over my pajamas. I looked into my vanity and pulled my hair back into a lazy lopsided bun. “Here goes,” I whispered, encouraging myself.

I shuffled my slippers over the wooden floor and followed the aroma of breakfast into my kitchen where my friends were conversing warmly.

“Good morning, guys,” I said.

“Well good morning, sleeping beauty,” Erza teased.

“Lu-chan!” Levy giggled, waving a spatula at me.

A mass of blue fur launched from my counter top and clung to my neck. “Luuuucccyyy!” Happy cried into my chest. “I was so scared you were gonna _die,_ ” Happy blubbered, overdramatic and obnoxious and usual. I chortled kindly, patting his soft head.

“I’m still here.”

“Yes, you are,” Natsu said. I turned and felt his gaze penetrating my soul, silently questioning my state of mind, questioning if I was okay with my friends being here. I smiled to answer his soundless query and sat on the bar stool beside him, placing the Exceed in my lap as I continued to stroke the pads of my fingers over his fur.

Once more, I wondered if maybe Natsu knew more than what he was letting on.

 

.+*+.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I hope you enjoyed the third installment of But a Thorn. If you have a second, please shoot me a review or a comment! I really love the feedback and criticism!  
> Gh057


	4. Concerned

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Hope you all enjoy this fairly light-hearted chapter!
> 
> Disclaimer: I do not own Fairy Tail. Trigger warning, there for a reason.

.+*+.

 

Concern clouded the dragon slayer's obsidian eyes as he watched his best friend absently stroke Happy's fur. He offered her a warm, encouraging smile. Loudly, Lucy's stomach growled. The smell of sizzling bacon wafted through the kitchen.

Levy giggled at the blush forming on Lucy's cheeks. "Lu-chan, I'm glad to see that you're hungry."

The celestial mage cast her eyes downward. "Mm, yeah," she replied shyly. Levy began to lob food onto plates. The scribe had outdone herself. Onto each dish she placed a mountain of eggs, fluffy with steam lazily rising from them. Following that was a thick stack of buttered pancakes, smothered in fresh strawberries and then came the thick slices of bacon, cooked flawlessly. The scribe finished up by pouring coffee into mugs and placing everything in front of her friends.

“Whoa!” Happy gasped, staring wide eyed at the food. “Levy!” The exceed proceeded to shovel his meal by the spoonful into his mouth.

Natsu followed suit, cramming a giant hunk of pancake into his gullet. “Thanksh Levy,” he garbled through his full mouth.

Ezra was quite a bit more refined, delicately cutting a strawberry into small slices before placing them into her mouth. “It is quite wonderful,” she commented with a smile, blotting her lips with the corner of a napkin.

“Thanks, Lev’,” Lucy said, not as enthusiastic as Natsu would have expected her to normally be. It seemed no one else read into her tone as she picked meekly at the contents of her plate. The dragon slayer swallowed his current mouthful before discreetly nudging her leg underneath the bar. Her deep brown eyes shot him a glance and subtly she nodded. “Gajeel is one lucky guy,” the celestial wizard said, smiling at her blue haired comrade.

“I’m glad you think so, Lu-chan. I feel like I’m the lucky one though.” She blushed and took a sip of her coffee, hiding the ridiculous grin plastered onto her face. “I enjoy cooking for you guys though, you don’t eat the silverware!”

“Lucy is correct,” the red head agreed. “You’re far too good for that metal head. He better realize that.”

Levy beamed.

“Where is Gajeel anyway?” Lucy questioned.

“Ah, he and Pantherlily went out to meditate this morning under the waterfall not too far from here in the forest. You know how they are.”

“Aye,” Happy nodded, his face sticky with syrup. “Lucy,” he added, twisting his head around to look at the blonde from the position on her lap. “Are you feeling better yet?”

“Mm, no not quite,” she said truthfully.

“Oh,” the cat sounded dejected. “Well, if you want I can go catch you a big fish! Or, when I see Carla today we can have Wendy come by and see if she can heal you.”

It had been several years since Natsu had brought Lucy to Magnolia for the first time. The ups and downs Fairy Tail had experienced never seemed to really cease. Gildarts now took on the role of master, though he insisted everyone keep referring to Makarov as such. Many more wizards had passed the S Class trials and their guild still held proudly onto their number one guild in Fiore title. Of course, their Sabretooth friends were always close on their heels. Wendy Marvel, the sky dragon slayer had grown into a very strong mage and a beautiful woman. Using the gift taught by Grandeeney, and with the aid of Porlyusica, she’d managed to become an S Class wizard at a very young age.

She’d honed her offensive spells to deal massive amounts of damage but where she really shined, as she always had, was through her support spells. Wendy was by far one of the toughest healers in all of Fiore and people outside of their continent even took pilgrimages to seek out her talents. So it was natural for Happy to suggest Lucy ask Wendy to heal whatever was ailing her but a shadow cast over her eyes as she dipped her head down shamefully.

“Erm, no Happy,” she stated calmly. “No, don’t bother Wendy. I’ll be fine. I don’t think this is something she could help with anyway.”

“Well, alright,” the Exceed replied with a shrug, turning back to his plate. Luckily, the cat didn’t pry any further.

However, tension crawled across the face of the weapon meister, her fork frozen in the air, forgotten. Her eyes shifted to Lucy as a scowl graced her features. Titania was stunning in every situation but the suspicion radiated off her in waves. Natsu's anxiety began to rise. He knew that his best friend wasn't ready to be confronted, by anyone, about her current state. Erza's red lips began to form an O as she began to speak.

In a panic, Natsu did the first thing he could think of. With a flash of brilliance the dragon slayer threw his arms out, as if going to stretch, and purposefully collided with both his, and Erza's piping hot mugs of coffee, flinging them off the bar and straight into the red head.

Brown liquid shot everywhere. The glasses bounced from Erza's lap and landed on the floor with a sickening crash. Sharp debris scattered over the floor like little needles made of porcelain. Happy shrieked and launched into the air, his hair fluffed out against his tail. Levy’s hands clasp over her lips, hazel eyes wide with disbelief.

Lucy sat, stunned, her gaze darting back and forth between the two mages.

Erza Scarlet calmly placed her drenched napkin onto the plate in front of her. Red blotches were appearing across her torso where the coffee had scalded her. Very light drops of blood oozed from her ankle where glass had left her with a small cut on her Achilles’ tendon. The pink haired wizard lowered his head, preparing for the onslaught.

The barstool hissed across the ground as Erza pushed away from the counter. “Lucy, be a dear and help me with this glass,” she said sweetly, much too pleasantly.

Lucy squeaked as the requip mage addressed her and quickly leapt from her seat, rushing over to grab a couple of dish towels to begin mopping up the mess.

Extending a slender arm to the side, Erza began to faintly glow. A sharp rapier materialized into her grasp. Her casual attire of a tank top and acid-washed jeans disappeared and was replaced by her traditional Heart Kruez armor. A vein bulged in her temple as she closed her eyes, gauntlet tightening against the hilt of her blade.

Like a deer caught in headlights, Natsu scrutinized his companion. He swallowed the nervous jitters that were trying to escape his throat. Stiffening his resolve, the dragon slayer straightened his posture and looked into the smoldering chocolate eyes of Erza Scarlet. “I’m sorry, Erza,” he said genuinely.

Her eyebrow twitched as she glared the male down. She gritted her teeth, jawline trembling with rage.

Lucy observed from the spot on the floor where she kneeled, drying up coffee and sweeping shards of glass into the bin Levy had retrieved. Erza remained silent, only the sound of the celestial wizard and scribe disposing of the shattered mug echoing through the kitchen.

In a blur of speed Erza flipped her sword around to the blunted side and in an arcing sweep smashed the cold, hard steel across Natsu’s abdomen effectively knocking the wind from his lungs. He sunk to the floor on his knees, rasping and clutching his stomach. “Apology accepted,” the redhead murmured as her sword evaporated and her armor was once more replaced with clothes designed more for comfort than battle.

For the next several minutes as the women cleaned up the mess Natsu had made he writhed on the ground. The blade had left a nasty, thick red line across his stomach that was sure to bruise even the dragon slayer. Still, Erza had held back; her temper only slightly having won out to the concern of her teammate. As if nothing had happened, Erza regarded Levy with a smile. “Breakfast was absolutely fabulous. You have quite the skill. Perhaps you’ll give Mirajane a run for her money.”

“T-thanks,” the blue-haired scribe stammered, blinking from the Requip mage to the dragon slayer, still heaving on the floor.

“Get up, Natsu. You’re being dramatic,” Erza commanded.

With a grunt of pain, he lifted himself back onto the chair and huffed, still rubbing at the injury. “Mavis, Erza you could have cut me in half,” he panted.

“Yes. I could have, but I didn’t.” The sweet tooth poked around the basket of strawberries until she found the plumpest and juiciest one before sticking it into her mouth.

Natsu looked at Happy with wide eyes, as if to say, “She’s out of her mind.” The exceed only shrugged and covered his face with his paws trying to hide the laughter he’d been holding in.

Lucy cleared their plates and began to load her dishwasher as they resumed their small talk. Mostly Erza lectured Levy on finally settling down with Gajeel and how she better not fall prey to becoming a stereotypical housewife. That Gajeel better never harm her in any way or he’d have Erza to deal with. At that, Lucy chimed in, “Me too!”

“Guys,” Levy said exasperatedly, “we’ve dated for over five years. Don’t you think I know Gajeel by now? I wish you’d put more faith in him!” She slammed her small fists on the counter, causing everyone in the room to jump in surprise. It was so rare for the solid script mage to show any sort of aggression that it had Erza frowning shamefully.

“I apologize, Levy. I just care for your wellbeing.”

“So does Gajeel.”

With his goofy grin plastered on his face, Natsu loudly agreed. “I don’t like that metal head too much, he’s cocky. But Levy is right. Dragons mate for life. They find their one true love—their soul mate and that’s who they remain with until the day they die. You have absolutely nothing to worry about with Gajeel, he’ll love Levy with every fiber of his being.”

Levy turned red as she looked at the dragon slayer affectionately. “Thank you, Natsu,” she whispered, grinning from ear to ear.

“Just speakin’ the truth,” he said matter-of-factly with a shrug.

“What do you know of love, Natsu?” Erza asked with a cocked brow, sincerely curious and not condescending at all.

His onyx eyes glanced for a moment to Lucy, a sponge in clutched in her right hand as she meticulously washed the iron pan. Suds stuck to her ivory skin. His breath hitched in his throat and it took him a second longer than it should have to respond. “I don’t really know much. I don’t have my mate,” he chose those words rather than _I haven’t found_ and for a moment chastised himself with eyes closed. “I only know what Igneel taught me before everything,” he gestured his hand wildly and tugged apprehensively at his scarf. The memory of everything his father had sacrificed for him made his stomach clench and he lifted his hand over his heart. He doubted he would ever see his dad in this lifetime again, pretty much had been guaranteed that was the case after Tartarus.

“Wendy’s said the same thing,” Happy agreed. “Grandeeney thought it would be important to speak of luuuurrrveee,” he enunciated with a rolling flair of the tongue, “before she sealed herself away. Even though Wendy was so young.”

“I see,” Erza said, fascinated by the history of the dragons. “Well, congratulations Levy.” The bitterness in her tone wasn’t on purpose and the scribe knew that.

“Jellal will come around,” she stated purely with a grin.

The faintest of smiles crept over Erza’s face as her memories turned to the blue-haired man. “I think it’s about time we went to the guild hall, Levy. Better make sure no one is destroying anything.”

“Mhm, good idea. Natsu, Happy, Lucy, you guys coming?” Levy asked.

“I haven’t showered or gotten dressed yet,” Lucy used as an excuse to stay home.

“You all go ahead, I’ll be around to poke at Gildarts later,” the pink-haired mage said with a yawn.

“Well, I’ll come! Carla is probably there by now!” the cat said, leaping from his perch.

With swift farewells the two were left alone in Lucy’s apartment. “I’m going to take a shower,” Lucy whispered and disappeared.

“Okay,” Natsu said to her vanished form with a frown.

 

.+*+.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Before you go leave me a review! I’ll be so happy!


	5. Breathing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I’m so sorry it took me so long to get this chapter up! Ever notice how everything crazy always happens all at once? Yeah… It’s been a rough few weeks for me. Please forgive me!  
> Disclaimer: I do not own Fairy Tail. Trigger Warning.

.+*+.

 

I scrubbed between my legs, trying to burn my skin away. I rubbed the rough loofa against my skin until there were tears in my eyes and pain was shooting down to my toes. I could not get the sensation of my attacker’s touch off. His smell burned into my nasal cavity.

Water cascaded over my body as I stood motionless in the stream. I sobbed into the crook of my arm, shaking violently until I stumbled out of the shower, throwing myself in front of the toilet. I vomited the contents of my stomach and the residual bile into the bowl. I wiped my mouth with the back of my hand and pressed my head against the cool porcelain, trembling from both my emotional state and the chill in the air as it attacked my soaked skin.

A loud knock at the door startled me. I threw my arms over my chest as I hiccupped my answer, “Yeah, what?”

“Luc’” Natsu’s voice called over the shower. “Are you alright?”

I blinked my heavy eyes and cleared my throat. I contemplated my answer and began to utter the phrase, “Yeah I’m fine,” but changed my mind at the last moment. I did not want to lie to my best friend anymore. It was absolutely obvious that I was not fine. “No,” I sobbed loudly.

The door handle jiggled as Natsu went to open the door. I inhaled sharply, glad I’d locked the door before I had gotten undressed. “Luc’, can I come in?”

“NO!” I shrieked, gripping my naked body tighter in my arms. “Natsu, I’m not dressed!” I yelled, my face lighting up with a ruby blush.

I heard the dragon slayer stumble backward from the door and regain his composure. “Oi’, sorry Luc’. I just… You’re not okay.” His fist lightly hit the door in frustration as his forehead leaned against the wood.

Nervously I stood and wrapped a towel tightly around my torso, leaving my hair dripping down my back. I turned the water off and cautiously unlocked the door. Natsu opened the door uncharacteristically calm and I greeted him with my tear stained face. Very unfeminine, I sniffled snot back up into my nose.

My best friend took in my shame, his black eyes weighing heavily on me. The pain etched into his features made me look down at the door, my hands balled into fists. “I’m so sorry,” I whispered. A tear drop escaped my eye and crashed onto the linoleum floor. The fog from the shower hung lazily around the room.

“Lucy!” Natsu said with one release of his breath, pulling my body into his arms. He cradled me against his warm chest. I buried my face into him, breathing him in and listening to the soothing rhythm of his heart beat. His strong fingers stroked through my wet hair, gently detangling it.

He slowly and carefully pulled me to the ground, using the wall to support his back as I laid against him. I unloaded my tears, all my pain and confusion, into his white shirt. He stroked my hair and teased his fingers up and down my spine as I cried. He didn’t care that I was drenching his clothing and covering him in the slime from my unfinished bath.

Repeatedly I blubbered that I was sorry, my voice muffled into his pectorals. He just comforted me in silence. By the time my tears had dried up all the fog in the bathroom had dissipated and my long blonde hair had dried into a messy frizzled mop. “Thank you, Natsu,” I whispered, pulling away from him and wiping my eyes.

“Are you okay?”

“Mm, I will be!” I said confidently and at that moment I knew it was true. I would be okay even if I never healed from this. With Salamander by my side I could accomplish anything of that I was sure. He didn’t release me from his hold as his onyx eyes darted back and forth, devouring every ounce of my fractured soul. My cheeks tinted to the same color of his hair and I smiled in embarrassment before wrapping my arms around his neck and embracing him in a comfortable hug.

It was his time to blush as I pulled away from him and stood. “I need to finish my shower.”

“O-okay,” he said, reaching his arm behind his neck. He pulled himself to his feet and disappeared out of the room. I closed the door and locked it once more. When I was back under the stream of water I let my mind wander. _How long is this emotional roller coaster going to last?_ I thought bitterly, squeezing shampoo into my hair and working it into a lather.

Once fully satisfied with my hygiene I got out of the shower and dried my hair. After a few minutes of contemplation, looking myself over in the mirror I decided that I wanted to try something new. I retrieved Cancer’s key and raised it into the air. “Open gate of the crab!”

With a poof the celestial spirit materialized in front of me. “Yo, yo, _ebi_ ,” he said, clicking his scissors together.

The minutes ticked away as he styled my hair, keeping me turned away from the mirror until he was finished. I tried to cheat and look at my reflection in his glasses but he always tilted his head at just the right angle to make sure I couldn’t see. The celestial spirit made small talk as the snipped away. Tendrils of brilliant blonde hair rained to the floor. White tiles stained with gold.

"I can always grow it back, _ebi_ ," Cancer reassured me, feeling my erratic heart beat throb on my neck.

I took a deep breath to steady my nerves. "Mm, yeah. Okay, let me see."

Cancer spun me delicately around until I was facing the busty blonde in the mirror. My breath hitched. His talented claws had sculpted my hair into something foreign. Styled into a short, choppy mess my hair framed my face to give me an edge I certainly didn't feel I had. Somehow my eyes seemed deeper, a more earthy brown. To add to my new look, the celestial spirit had tied a long, silken scarf around my head, acting as a hair band to keep my bangs from invading my eyes. It was in my favorite shade of blue, icy and intense just like a clear sky. Silver stars were woven into the cloth, an ode to my magical attunement.

"Different, _ebi."_

I smiled toothily at my reflection. "It's perfect, thank you!" I cried excitedly before closing the gate of the crab.

I added the finishing touches to my look, smearing light makeup over my face. With a strong resolve, I opened the door to find Natsu Dragneel, lazing boredly on the couch. The male was laying on his side, propping his head up with a fist as he casually flicked through the book he was reading. With every page flip he licked the pads of his index finger. What an odd sight, to see Natsu reading a book. I let my feet glide across the floor, inching closer to inspect what it was that had he engrossed. How strange, it appeared as if it wasn't typed but written by hand. It took a couple seconds for me to connect the dots. The leather binding was a very familiar purple. My face fell. With dismay, I let out a shriek and dived towards him.

My diary!

I collided into the dragon slayer with a fantastic oomph. The crown of my head rammed into his nose, instantly watering both our eyes. I scrambled to free my journal away from his grubby fingers. The pounding of my heart raised into my throat as I cradled the book close to my chest. Natsu was busy cursing, holding his nose as tears leaked down his cheeks. “Mavis! Wha’ the heck Luc’?” he grumbled.

“You can’t just go through my journal!” I screeched back at him.

Deep stormy eyes gazed up at me, crisp and clear in their obsidian stare. A surge of guilt struck through me as I held onto the book. Shamefully, I bent my head. A soft tug on the diary grabbed my attention. “Lucy,” Natsu whispered and his tone sounded pained. His chest rose and fell steadily, even though I was still perched on his abs from where I’d tackled him. Nervously I glanced down at my pink-haired companion. Onyx orbs pierced me down to my core and I felt my flesh flush. Slowly a tanned arm lifted and his fingers brushed unkempt strands of blonde hair back from my face. “Lucy, you look gorgeous,” his voice barely hit my ears but the smile he gave me lit my world.

“You like it?” I asked stupidly, toying with the scarf between nervous fingers.

“Definitely! Though, you’re always pretty.” He shifted so he was sitting up and without any effort he lifted me off of him and to my own cushion on the couch. Such an offhanded compliment, almost as if he hadn’t meant to praise me at all. Natsu had called me pretty so easily. Stated like a fact rather than an opinion. It made my confidence grow, if only slightly. For the first time in the last week, I felt good about myself. “Where’s your head at?” he inquired, suddenly concerned.

“Nowhere. It’s just… That was very sweet of you to say.” I flashed him a ginormous smile.

He cocked an eyebrow and laughed. “I didn’t say it to be sweet. You’re a gorgeous woman, Lucy. Everyone in all of Fiore, no all of Earthland—and Edolas—can see that. Even the celestial spirits agree.” I blushed heavier at his words, the goofy grin couldn’t fall off my face. “Anyway,” Natsu continued as if he hadn’t just made my heart ache, “do you feel up to going to the guild hall? I’d love to show you off.”

I contemplated a moment. “Mm, yeah! Sure. As long as,” I bit my lip, “please promise not to leave my side. I don’t… I can’t handle being alone. I need you next to me.”

“Of course,” he said without questioning my motives. He leapt from the couch and extended his hand to me. “Let’s go!”

I laughed freely as we sprinted from my apartment, hand in hand.

The sound of the guild hall crashed into my ears. People were laughing, talking, and the sound of cutlery banging on the wooden tabletops: music. Mirajane stood behind the bar, drying a stein as she chortled flamboyantly with her siblings. Elfman had his arm draped protectively around Evergreen. Lisanna giggled into her coffee mug, her blue eyes shimmering. Gildarts, Cana, and Makarov clustered together a few feet away from the trio. The brunette was reading her cards in between guzzling ale.

Freid and Laxus sat away from everyone, in a corner table to themselves. I couldn’t help but smile as I noticed the two holding onto each other’s hands underneath the board. They appeared to be in a heated conversation, lightning positively crackling around Laxus’ head. No doubt Freid was lecturing on Laxus on being more careful, pleading to let him enchant him with protection spells even though it’d been a few weeks since Laxus had even attempted to do a mission solo without the Thunder Legion.

Levy sat curled into Gajeel’s lap, her reading glasses on though her book forgotten as she spoke to Gray and Juvia who occupied the table with them. The iron dragon slayer rolled his eyes and tilted his head back, grumbling something in a whisper to Pantherlily which caused Levy to scowl and push against his hard chest. The two blue-haired mages certainly adored their respective men, Juvia absentmindedly stroking Gray’s arm, deep in conversation.

The red haired requip mage, Erza Scarlet, sat by herself with a slice of strawberry cake. She was staring at her food, frowning. I noticed that her call card (Cana had made one for both her and Jellal) propped against her cup, dark. My heart ached for her. Her love for Jellal had only grown as the years had gone by. But he was still focused on destroying dark guilds, insisting that he didn’t deserve a life of happiness with Erza. Wendy Marvel sauntered over to Erza and sat beside the weapon smith, instantly brightening her mood and causing her to forget about the card she’d been anxiously waiting on. Wendy had grown into a stunning woman. Her chest had never quite filled out but she was stunning nonetheless. Her face was angular like a model, his blue hair long and silky. Her eyes were wide and bright and her smile was a small, spectacular line that always brought joy with it.

Everything seemed like business as usual but I still felt my heart rising into my throat. I stumbled through the door, nervous. Natsu was there to catch me, help me regain my balance. Always my rock. The constant in my life.

Mira was the first to notice us enter. She extended her slender arm in a polite wave. "Hey Lucy! Hi Natsu!" she called to us with her signature grin.

I smiled and waved back. Natsu excitedly shouted, "Mira! Whip me up some grub, I'm starved!" I rolled my eyes, exasperated. The dragon slayer could eat tirelessly and never feel content. "Where do you want to sit Lucy?" he asked in a whisper, turning to look into my face. He didn't leave my side, just as he'd promised.

My gaze shifted nervously across the hall. "Um, how about over there?" I pointed to the table against a column where Levy was talking excitedly with Juvia, her tome in a forgotten heap. Natsu smirked knowingly at me. With his hand braced against the small of my back, the pink haired male guided me over to them.

"Lu!" Levy exclaimed as I sat opposite her, Natsu sitting between me and Gray.

"Hey Lucy," Gray said.

Gajeel simply grunted and nodded in acknowledgement to our presence. And Juvia waved warmly. "Juvia is glad to see you're feeling better."

"Mm, yeah. I'm getting there," I replied.

I let the conversation melt around me. The murmur suffocating all my senses as I cleared my mind and let my vision blur. I wrung my hands together anxiously under the table, chewing absently at my lip. Natsu felt my unease and subtly gave my knee a reassuring squeeze. I barely noticed Mira trot over with his lunch. My attention was elsewhere.

_Rancid odor invading my nostrils. Hot, sticky breath licking across the nape of my neck. Every single inch of my body that he touched seared my flesh, burning with complete and utter agony. His green hair tickled my chin a sensation that felt absolutely wrong. Tears slid silently from my eyes, staining my makeup streaked face. The blocked out the sound of his voice, hissing insults into my ear, telling me that this was what I wanted all along. His rough hands fondled my breasts against the crimson fabric, squeezing hard enough that I was sure they’d explode. Nothing compared to the pain that came next. He plunged into my sacred area, ripping me apart._

“Lucy!” Natsu hissed into my ear, startling me from my daydream. “Your heart sounds like it’s about to leave your chest, are you okay?”

My eyes watered, my skin crawled. I trembled violently at the nasty memory. “No. I’m not okay. Natsu, let’s leave.”

He didn’t hesitate. Instantly the pink haired dragon slayer stood from the bench and pulled me up with him. “Lucy isn’t feeling well, I’m taking her home.” Without waiting for a response, he swept me out of the guild hall. Even his food remained unfinished, my best friend’s concern for me greater than anything else.

Wind swirled through my short hair as we left. I gulped down huge breaths, calming my nerves. We walked back to my apartment in silence, Natsu never straying from my side. At the door, I hesitated. “Natsu?” I whispered, out of breath.

“Yeah Luc’?”

“I’m not ready to go inside. Can we go sit outside somewhere?”

“Of course. Want to go to the park?”

I nodded.

The park was blissfully silent. Gently, the dragon slayer led me to a huge Rainbow Sakura tree. It felt like eons ago that Natsu and Happy had uprooted this exact tree and shipped it down the canal when I was sick and stuck in bed so that I could experience it in bloom for the first time. Since then, the tree had flourished after he’d replanted it. Now it stood as the most glorious tree in all of Magnolia and even had a placard set in stone near it commemorating Natsu’s brazen act. We sat side by side, leaning against the bark.

With my eyes turned upwards at the azure sky, I made up my mind to tell Natsu. I argued and debated with myself the entire walk here. I needed someone I could talk to. I wanted someone other than my spirits who I could confide in about my rape. A deep sigh escaped my lips and he turned his eyes in my direction. “Natsu,” I breathed. “I need to tell you something.”

 

.+*+.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Cliffhanger! Sorry. Couldn’t resist.

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: Well... There's the first chapter. Please review or leave a comment! ^-^


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